Waiting sucks for everyone!
A lot has happened over the past few months since I last posted. Got knocked up(which my mother says can't happen if you are married-apparently knocked up actually means pregnant without a husband-which is not what dictionary.com says.) I discovered I didn't have the funding to finish my last year of college. I got lost in Ikea the weekend I went with my brother and his wife. And some eps of A Pup Named Scooby Doo finally came to DVD. Here's the thing: as exciting as all that is I have discovered that I am too lazy to blog 8 times a day like my brother or even once a week like my sister. All that aside I found something on the internet I wanted to post today, a list of things to do at Walmart when you are waiting on a slow-ass.(usually I am the slow-ass) Some of the ideas made me laugh out loud and since I, unfortunately, am not a laugh out loud type gal, thought it worth blogging after my long three month absence.
Things to do at Walmart / ASDA while your friends / family take their own sweet time
1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I think we have a code 3 in housewares," and see what
happens.
5. Put some M&M's on lay away.
6. Move CAUTION WET FLOOR signs to carpet areas.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department, tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
10. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible.'
11. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
12. In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
13. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through whisper "PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
15. Go to the fitting room and yell real loud....."Hey we're out of toilet paper in here!"
Things to do at Walmart / ASDA while your friends / family take their own sweet time
1. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I think we have a code 3 in housewares," and see what
happens.
5. Put some M&M's on lay away.
6. Move CAUTION WET FLOOR signs to carpet areas.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department, tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
10. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible.'
11. While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
12. In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
13. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through whisper "PICK ME! PICK ME!!!!!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"
15. Go to the fitting room and yell real loud....."Hey we're out of toilet paper in here!"
posted by dawnsia at 9:45 AM
1 comments
